My head is bare and full of air, dead flies and bits of fluff.

Pips to find what this blog's about. Have a peek, take a perch if it pleases you, then swish away in a cloud of sparkles knowing that you have made a truly fantabulous decision, you sparkling pinnacle of human perfection.

 

Right, I’m off on a music tour for 10 days, so probably no posts for a while- this marks the end of my queue.. Bye guys :)

fernacular:

mccallientes:

why all the merdudes gotta have the cool ass shark fins? why can’t some merladies have cool sharkfins and the merdudes have some sparkly ass beautiful scales that you need metaphors about rainbows to describe

i wanna see a cute merlady with a fucking killer whale for half her body chatting up some cute merdude with a rainbowfish tail ok 

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rwby-rose:

vaguelyjewish:

testoster0ne:

how do woman not orgasm when inserting tampons.

like isn’t just like having sex idgi?

This sounds like a Mitt Romney diary entry.

how do men not orgasm when putting on a condom

like isn’t just like having sex idgi?

(Source: basedyeeezus)

raptorific:

I see how it is. Rihanna can wear a shiny, completely transparent dress in public and everyone loves it, but when I did it, I was “wasting saran wrap” and “ruining Easter, Daniel.”

awwww-cute:

My friend had her daughters at a zoo when she heard, “Ma’am, there’s a lemur on your baby

awwww-cute:

My friend had her daughters at a zoo when she heard, “Ma’am, there’s a lemur on your baby

grimdarkthroes:

realslimcaity:

IHust wiOke upmy whol hOUSSe

I’m telling this story again b/c fuck it but anyways I was playing D&D and one of my friends went “brown bear brown bear what do you see” and on cue three of us turn to him and like, death metal screech “ALLLL”.

The dude goes completely pale faced. I saw true horror in his eyes. 

He didn’t know the joke.

So apparently dude just had three of his best friends demonically screech at him for no goddamn reason.

I do not think I will ever cause that level of sheer terror and confusion ever again in my life.

(Source: boiledjeans)

Played 467,203 times

thegirldetective:

tordles:

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I just forgot I had my Bluetooth hooked up to the wireless portable speakers and I’m laying in my bed and the speakers are in the living room and I hit play on my phone and heard it play faintly in the silence of the night from the other room and I just about screamed from fear before I realized what was going on

Reactions from people whose language I was trying to learn:

fatnajl:

linguisticsyall:

Germans: Oh you’re learning German? Hey, you’re not so bad at it. Don’t fuck it up though. 

French: About time you learned French. 

Russians, Koreans, Spanish-speakers: WOW YOU’RE LEARNING MY LANGUAGE? LET ME HELP YOU I CAN GET SOME MATERIALS FOR YOU AND RECOMMEND SOME SITES AND VIDEOS, DID YOU JUST SAY “HELLO” IN MY LANGUAGE? YOU ARE SO GREAT WOW I AM SO IMPRESSED

Dutch: but why would you do this

why would you do this

rumpelstiltskln:

if I had a twin I would go into crowds of strangers and profess my love to someone and then say “if our love isn’t meant to be, I will go back in time and slap myself” and then my twin would burst in and slap me